Merry Christmas.... Ha bloody Ha Ha

So Christmas is over, and that's depressing enough but to add to my post Christmas woes I got laid off on boxing day.

I worked every hour they asked me to, came in every time they called and what did I get in return. No thank you or a merry Christmas just "were sorry business slows down now and we have to let you go." 

hmmm so after 3 months and 10 days after I started I am unemployed again.  

As much as I try not to be sad and angry, I still feel cheated. 

however now I have time to relax again (and work on my blog) and my photography. 

I have decided to take a week of rest and relaxation before applying for more jobs. I have made a list of 9 places that i should apply to in the hope that one might take a chance on me.

so onward and upward :) 

I hope you all had a merry Christmas and i hope you have an even better new year.

Here's to 2011 

Owww

IMG-20101109-00338.jpg
Originally uploaded by ~Katie Miller~
Just when you think you've turned a corner BAM. You get hit by a speeding bus !
Ok not literally but things were staring to look good and today I get up and my leg feels stiff. Not such a big deal since I've been working but I know this stiffness.
This time last year I had microfracture surgery on my left ankle see here Photo of the foot  and  Here and tonight the damn foot feels much like it did pre surgery.
Tomorrow is my day off so hopefully I can rest and let my weary feet recover.
And hopefully I won't have to make an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon!

Fear and Loathing…

Imagine your worst fear and multiply it by 1,000,000 and you probably come somewhere close to how i feel about my biggest fear.

before i tell you what it is, you need to understand just how bad it is for me. I shake, sweat, panic, cry, I hyperventilate, i feel like my heart will jump right out of my chest. I cant sleep properly if i think about it. So what is it that does this to me…..

DEATH

ok so you’re probably like HAHA, but the thought of dying absolutely freaks me out. It runs through my mind like a black and white movie.

I see nothing but darkness and my coffin in the ground and I never see my baby or husband or anyone ever again. there’s no music. I cease to exist. I can’t even explain it well enough without wanting to cry.

My husband thinks I’m crazy and I need to have “Faith” but how exactly will faith help me overcome this fear and faith in what ?

How do normal people go about daily life not breaking down and having panic attacks about this and surely to a certain extent this is somewhat normal. I loathe myself because i feel this way !

other people have “Irrational fears” what’s yours and how do you cope with it ?

http://phobialist.com/  to find yours

Camping Again !

So on Wednesday i went camping again, it was such a blast and although i missed Sam, i enjoyed the break.

Day one was so much fun, we found a site and set up the tent. Then we went exploring it was a lovely site and a great pitch. we were right by the river and some mini waterfalls.

 

we spent some of the day playing cards and scattergories, a little more exploring and then we looked at the stars.

Day two didn’t start particularly well neither of us sleep well and it was freezing all night. We drove to Kirkwood to get ice and firewood and got some coffee to warm us up.

We decided to take a small hike to a spot behind the campsite called the pot holes, it was really nice. There were large pools of water and rocks you could slide down into them, kind of like a natural water park.

My Mom in law and Sam visited today and we all had lunch together and then went down to the lake. Sam liked throwing rocks into the water.

Got back to camp long enough for Sam to fall twice.. he calmed down really quickly though. Then mom and Sam left. I cried for 10 minutes after they left, i have no idea why !

when i finally stopped crying, I cooked hotdogs over the fire for dinner, mine fell in the fire LOL. i had to cook two.

Ben decided that the firewood we got from the store wasn’t enough so we went scouting for wood and found a bit. Now people understand Ben likes his campfire big and burn-y lol so it should come as no big surprise he got the biggest piece of wood he could find.

once the fire was nicely stocked and giving us much need warmth we turned off our camp lights and got our chairs and watched the Perseid Meteor shower.

The shower is visible from mid-July each year, with the peak in activity being between August 9 and 14, depending on the particular location of the stream. During the peak, the rate of meteors reaches 60 or more per hour. They can be seen all across the sky, but because of the path of Swift-Tuttle's orbit, Perseids are primarily visible in the northern hemisphere. As with all meteor showers, the rate is greatest in the pre-dawn hours.

It was totally romantic and beautiful, watching the light streak across the sky was incredible

 

we woke up on Friday Warm and happy. so we packed up camp got in the car and drove home.

What did you do this week ?

Catch Up

 

What have i been doing since i last blogged? well that’s an interesting question. and here’s the answer.

i spent my first 4th of July in the states

I went to the beach

I went Camping and on a boat !

and to the state fair !

you can see the rest of my pictures here My Flickr Photostream

I like being here, this country is beautiful.

we are taking Sam to the fair tonight which should be interesting ! so what have you guys been doing ?

Road Trip !

OK So some of you will know that i have just moved to the states and that to get here, my sister and my son and I took a road trip. We drove from Chicago to Sacramento.
Above is the actual map of the journey, and here are the facts.

• 2278 miles 
• 5 motels
• $318 in gas
• $722 Rental car
• $307 motel fee's
• $100 in food and supplies 

 The first night was spent in a Motel 6 in Chicago, looked ok from the outside but the room was a bit grotty ! but seriously after expecting a barrage of questions or some kind of interview at Immigration (which did not happen... they didn't even ask if i was who i claimed to be) i was glad to have a bed and sleep.

Grinnell Iowa, our first driving day motel during a thunderstorm !

The Rockies ! absolutely breathtaking !

we visited the Arches national Park.  It's a stunning place well worth visiting and I would definitely go ago but maybe in winter as it was 104F the day we went. also take a lot of bottled water.

 My Son who was brilliantly behaved for 98% of the trip and who can blame him for being a little grumpy.
Even I after 8 hours in a car got grumpy

we wanted to stay at this hotel in Utah but ran out of funds.
Then Disaster !
My Sisters Debit and credit card got blocked by the bank because she had used them in 4 different states !!!

we had to stop and call the international dept of the bank... 20 minutes on hold and 50 Quarters later we got some joy. This is where we stopped to make the call.

Helper, UT

Lovelock, NV
Our Last Motel, the Covered Wagon.. old dusty looking place but deceptive.
they even had free wifi as you can see.
The room was large and clean and had a kitchenette the bathroom was a little cramped but hey no worries i didnt spend much time in there.

Finally a sign i can get excited about !

ARRIVAL !!!!!!


I finally made it after 6 days traveling in total... Tired? Yes Emotional? Yes and Relieved? Very much so
and that is how i ended up here !
now i just have to wait for that magical green card and a SS# and I'm all set.

Hello America !

Goodbye, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Goodnight

This is it. the final night at home... what i have considered my home for 25 years !

actually all my life.

 

this house will always have special memories for me, good and bad, but i have loved the house more than the place. if i could take the house with me i probably would.

OK so its not the Ritz and its not a slum.. its comfortable and homely and has enough room for my junk. i am feeling kinda emotional as i look around and see half of my life lying around and the other half stuffed into 2 suitcases and a duffel bag.
The UK isn't the best country in the world but it far from the worst and i will certainly miss some of the perks of living here.. National Health Service for a start.
 

 (this wouldn't have been possible without the NHS)








Saying goodbye is hard, I should know I've done it often enough..but this one is different.

my heart breaks a little and a tear rolls down my face, and then i look to my right and there's Sam ( Smiling in his sleep) and I remember why I am doing this... For Us, For me and Ben, For me.

I know life will be a lot different in the states and i cant wait to start this adventure ! I want to thank My sister Marie for everything she has done, without her none of this would have been possible. i will truly miss her.
i will miss most of this family, but now i have to concentrate on MY Family. Ben, Sam and Me.

I hope you will continue to follow me on this huge journey and bear with me through the next 2-3 weeks of weird FB posts Emotional Tweets and Crazy Blog posts.

So Goodbye, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Goodnight, I'm leaving tomorrow. 
To Be Continued......