We all get old and we all choose the way we age, be it gracefully or refusing to let our age show.
recently i have felt myself aging and although my biggest fear is death, i know that aging is actually a good thing.
I am becoming womanly and motherly instead of childish and childlike.
my problem with aging is that as i age i find myself becoming more insecure than ever, paranoia fills my mind a great deal of the time. I question the true feelings of the people that i love and love me.
I wonder if other women go through this or is it just me in my screwed up world.
Lately i have really been questioning my husbands feelings for me, he tells me he loves me everyday and yet i still do not believe it entirely.
He is a loving husband, a wonderful father and yet i still feel second best. of course the 5,000+ miles between us doesn't help.
i just want him to do something without me prompting him, without me telling him what i need. and then feeling like i am the wicked witch of the west.
I love him with everything in me, I can't stop loving him. I need him.
2 comments:
All very normal insecurities. Also, when you couple in the huge, life altering move you are preparing for, well, bingo, that explains a lot about the way you are feeling. Hang in there, hon, things are going to get crazier before they get calmer, but the will get better.
You just need to take a deep breath, know we all feel that way and know you are headed for great things!
Cheers, dear!
I am sure that 99% of all this is the big trip looming over me.
I cant wait to get over there and just breathe for a while.
thanks Mandy, its good to know i'm not completely crazy :)
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